I turned to her and asked how she viewed sex, this apparently opened something inside her. She opened by saying sex is a chore she has to perform so my mood swings were kept under control.

It is something she is now not interested in and the more I want it the less she does, but to enable a happy house hold she has sex with me.

I do get in a bit of a pissy if we haven’t in a week or so but I can’t control it. I have tried. But new chapter want obviously to change this and turn this around to her enjoying it. Although saying all this she happily accepts me masturbating her when she is on, and she initiates most of our sexual activity.

So where do i take it from here

 

Mistress?

 

MOVE ON!!!

worst part is Im talking to myself too. ms doles it out like its either an obligation or a treat rather than wanting or enjoying it. F-N hate my situation, but it too shall change

 

I love her though, we have a happy life it's just this hurdle we need to jump over. so i have made obvious effort in triying not to offend

 

Mostly in situations such as this the problem isn't that they don't like sex, though perhaps that very well could be the case, but rather that they don't want to have the sex you want to have. If they feel that their needs aren't even an issue and they're just a hole you use to get off sex will naturally become something they have no interest in. Try to find out what it is they do, or used to, enjoy most about sex or at the very lest what about your current sex life is so onerous. In the case of the OP it might simply be a case of your attitude towards not getting it. Your wife may feel as if she is less a loved and desired woman and more of an object that has to perform her duty which is enforced by the way you act if she doesn't. Though you said you've tried not to get in a bad mood if you don't have sex for a while, I suggest just trying harder. If you can get it under control, then your wife won't feel like sex is an obligation and may start to desire it as recreation again.

 

Thankfully i want her to be her and not what i want her to be. so for now it's as good as it gets as i have found new resolution to my will. xx

Its not hard being happy you just have to want to be happy and you are.

 

I'm in a similar situation though my wife likes it when we eventually get going she looks at it as a chore.

Look for obvious reasons for her low sex drive (the pill being top of the list) stress or money, that kind of thing.

I have the same problem with being moody when i've gone a week or so without sex. My biggest problem is facing the fact that if I say in this relationship the best of my sex life is basically behind me....

 

God dont say that!!! Being only a year behind you that is a terrible thought.

Thinking that a big change is due in yourself gets you half way there to brightening your future trust me.

 

I'm in a situation very much like yours. I have asked what she thought if I found "releif" somewhere else.

She is OK with it as long it is not with one of our freinds or with some she knows about. It must never get out and she doesn't want to discuss it ever.

So, I've got the green light but I haven't yet crossed the street.

 

You know this is leading to divorce, right?